It was a gloomy night... I just got myself into an argumentative situation again and was truly hurt, upset and tired. But as I devote my heart to the Lord I suddenly felt so much in the spirit and just feel like writing my heart out. I was telling God that I miss those times when I was flying where I got to see the amazing things of the world. How much I depended on Him when I was so broken on board (being bullied and working like mad). And when I was all by myself be it on board or overseas doing sightseeing alone, sleeping alone, eating alone or mingling with complete strangers I met along the way. It was the time when there was only ME and HIM. I felt so so close with God. Right away I have this urge to update my blog.
I bought a book the other day. It is about writing entitled "If You Want To Write". Initially, I thought it is a book that guides people how to get started in writing. You know I just feel like writing a book! Haha... As I read on it speaks more on what writing is all about. It says that everyone is talented and everyone can write. Every day we encounter so many things in our lives that we can express and share. Well it also states about some people having a lot of emotions even by merely looking at the sky and they would express them through drawings or paintings just like the famous Dutch post-impressionist artist Vincent Van Gogh. I was so touched when I read that... I suddenly felt that I am not being too emotional or "abnormal" at all. You know the feeling that you finally found someone who is similar to you and support you! It was just awesome...
The reason I say this is because what the author stated simply describes me! I would say I am a person who truly admires wonderful sceneries around the world. Mountains, trees, sea, the sky, clouds, stars! It always reminds me of our almighty God who is the Creator of all these beautiful things in the world. It truly reflects His glory with the way He places different kinds of landscape and nature across different locations on earth. Each time I look at these things or when I just simply look at the sky... admiring its beauty... I start to have a lot of emotions, insights and am just so full with peace, love and joy. Most of the time I do not share these feelings with anyone. Perhaps I did share with my loved ones at times. But I was not really that comfortable expressing all these because I was afraid that the person might not believe it or they would just laugh it off or considering me a freak. But until I read that book it makes me realised that I am not a freak at all... this is part of the creative and loving side of me. Unlike Vincent Van Gogh I did not draw or paint but I express myself through writing and of course talking as well! :)
I was listening to hymns of praise and worship while I wrote this blog... the Lord has given me peace... and I felt close to Him... it was not a devotion or prayer session... but to me it was a wonderful quiet time with Him... as I write I give glory to Him... Amen